Wish List…

This is going to be an ongoing list of wishes, from everything inside my head, whether material crap or inner work, it will go here.

You know, I have no right to have a wish list.  Why?  Well, ’cause I have more than I ever should.  By all rights, I should be dead right now, not basking in the light of Love and Care from a man, I, in no way deserve.  I am, by no means, close to being a model citizen or remotely virtious.  I have done everything backwards and against any moral upbringings I may have had in my time on this earth.  The few values I hold close to my heart, I have even broken them!  I am an unstable, damaged, greedy, selfish, uneducated, voilent, careless, unintelligibly, impractical, illogical, insecure, messy, lazy individual.  I am sure I can find a few more adjectives that fit my character traits, but it would take up a novel to get them all down.  Now, here is this man.  Self-sufficient, humorous, hard worker, self-disciplined(mostly), patient, caring, self-sacrificing, passive, giving, innocent, supportive, mindful, present, educated, skillful, logical, secure, loving and so much more.  I have done nothing but make this mans life hell on earth and he still keeps coming for more.  “Why?” I ask, and he responds because “I love you.”  I look at him in awe all the time, but I am not sure he knows that.  I don’t think I could ever really show him how much he means to me and I am sure I would screw it up somehow just trying.  He deserves so much more out of life and someone who can really show him how truly wonderful he is.  Not that I would will him to go, but that is simply out of my own greed and selfishness.  I am totally addicted to him in every way.   Because of him, I live a life of security, love, happiness, and peace.  None of which, did I ever have in my life before him.  Even so, I am such a selfish, rude individual, I continue to ask for more!!!  “What is Wrong! with me?!”  I ask for so much more, all the time.  It really is horrible of me and completely insensitive.  Am I going to stop, though?  Nope.  I keep going.  I guess until I run him into the ground and he has had enough and leaves.  Believe me, when I say I have tried many times to stop myself from this eternal greed and it only grows steadily stronger.  So, I am hoping that if I get all the “wants” on paper or here when they come up, I can move on from them, rather than have them sit in my head, making things rather “blocked”.

Extra Lesson and Remedial Education, Resource Teacher’s Developmental Exercise Manual

Three Cups of Tea: One Mans Journey to Change the World,…One Child at a Time by Greg Mortenson

Listen to the Wind by Greg Mortenson

The Extra Lesson: Movement, Drawing and Painting Exercises to Help Children with Difficulties in Writing, Reading and Arithmetic by Audrey McAllen

Take Time: Movement Exercises for Parents, Teachers and Therapists of Children with Difficulties in Speaking, Reading, Writing and Spelling by Mary Nash Wortham & Jean Hunt

Putting the Heart back into Teaching by Stanford Maher & Yvonne Bleach

Jumbo Flyer with four bobbins and tensioned lazykate for my Baynes spinning wheel.

Matchless DD Spinning Wheel.

Special needs Nanny/Nurse.

Laptop.

Divorce from former Husband.

Big Diamond ring that says I am actually worth the trouble and expense.

Big Wedding with all my friends and family and all the trimming.

Spinning Fiber Retreat/Class.

$ to go to Doctors.

Shelving through out house.

New Kitchen cabinets and custom built island.

Adjustable school desk like this … http://www.standupforlearning.com/

More legos

More storage

Walls Lazure Painted through out house.

New flooring for house.

Porch sanded and stained.

To visit MA every other month.

To move south.

To be able to attend a gym daily that  gives instruction for Tai Chi.

To finish my Holistic Health Practitioner Diploma.

To obtain a degree in anything.  I like the idea of continuing my passion for art and now include Fiber media.

To be able to go to church every week and attend my small group ministries and theological courses.

To attend several of the Pagan Festivals through out the country.

To go out on dates regularly with S.

To have a bag custom made for my knitting project and spinning wheel.

Enough money to afford the curriculum that best suites my needs and values for each of my children.

Cleaning person to clean the floors and walls once a week. or even twice a month!

Spinning Chair custom built by Norm Hall.